I don’t believe darkness is an entity of it own. I don’t believe it’s a living thing capable of moving growing or influencing all by itself. Or because of its ability. 

As far as I’m concerned,Darkness is simply the name used to denote the absence of a thing. That thing is called light. 

No man trying to dispel darkness succeeds at this by fighting darkeness. No, picture somebody running around in a dark space vigorously flailing his/her arms in the air and hurling insults. Would that solve the problem? Would that dispel the darkness? 

No, that’ll simply get the person written off as insane, mentally unstable, not to be taken seriously and not suitable for work.

Darkness is neither dispersed by crying, weeping, wailing to high heavens, neither is it dispersed by blaming all the people who’ve been there before or who put you in that dark state. No. 

To get rid of darkness it’s quite simple. You just have to turn on the light. In most cases increase the light. Needless to say at that moment darkness is no where to be seen. It’s gone just like that. 

So I’m not sure what you’re going through. What dark corner you or they have boxed you into, or maybe you’ve unconsciously been swallowed or lost in its wide expanse. It doesn’t really matter how. All that matters is that you turn on the light and keep increasing it.

I urge you to atleast give it a try. Find the light source, keep it on a perpetual increase and watch your self/relationship/situation or whatever, get better. 

Written April 15, 2016 at 3:32am.
Image source.


My parents Francis and Ada are some of the greatest people I’ll ever meet in my whole existence, both this life and the lives to come. 

They’ve taught me that life is best lived according to the teachings of Jesus Christ. They haven’t done this by forcing me to accept the gospel. Neither have they done this by forcing me to see things as they do or appreciate everything they appreciate. 

They’ve done this simply by some means making me fall in love with the kind of life they’re living. Making me want to live just like them. 

And here’s the thing, In trying to be like them, I realize that I am being more like the savior and living the gospel of Jesus. 

This as far as I’m concerned is what it means to teach in the Savior’s way. This is why I say they’re the greatest teachers I could ever have and the best set of friends I could ever ask for. And this is the pattern I want to use with my kids and all who I might be privileged to influence. 

I hope to God, no I pray to God, that my children can say the same about me. I pray that yours too can say same about you. 

Dad and mum God bless you for me.




A few thoughts on succeeding against the odds. 

Written April 9, 2016.

I was thinking about life in Nigeria the other day. I realized it’s really hard to do things here (or maybe anywhere else even). Like someone that wants to fail or who isn’t ready to put in all the work has lots of excuses. 

For example, power supply is erratic, transportation to and fro is stressful, communication network/internet connectivity is poor, the infrastructure is lacking. All of which are needed to achieve what one wants. 

And it might not be just in Nigeria. Wherever you are, you would find the challenges peculiar to that place that make it difficult for you to do the things you want, to live your dreams or chase your passions. 

Then I thought to myself, what makes a person great is not succeeding without challenges, it’s succeeding in spite of these challenges! A success story is sweeter not when the odds were always in your favor, but when they weren’t in your favor. 

What I’m trying to drive at is this. 

We are great when we are able to succeed in spite of our challenges, be it emotional, physical, mental, social, national, whatever it might be. 

Like I said, that’s what makes the success story sweet. 
We have all it takes to be great. You have greatness within you, question is are you willing to let it out? 

I used willing for a reason. Cause where there’s a will fam, there’s always a way. 

Do have a great day. 


What is it about driving in Lagos that would turn the most gentle individuals to savages? In all my musing, I am yet to find out. I can only hope, no decide, that whenever I drive, I would be different. 

I was listening to the radio some time last year, on the way to a function, when the radio presenter introduced a challenge. He announced a prize of Fifty thousand Naira for anyone who could drive from the main land to the island without abusing any other road user. 

“Pft, easy!”, was my response. But that was before he introduced the catch. The catch was that no one should abuse you too. And everyone in the studio began to laugh like it was something impossible. Maybe just maybe, because they’re right and it actually is? 

As much as like to defy norms and limitations given by society which most people gladly adopt, I having lived in Lagos for getting to four years now, cannot deny the fact that it is impossible do drive such a long distance, braving the traffic, without being abused or yelled at. When such things and people as reckless cyclists, dreaded drivers of the yellow bus, and seasoned captains of the beat up molués still exist. It is indeed a given. An event we have the least bit of control ever.

My style in situations and events I have no control over however, has always been the same. One in which prevents me from unnecessary stress and headache. And that is too leave that which I have no control over while focusing on the things which I can control. Most at times, my response and attitude to the things I can not control. 

When driving in Lagos, aye and in all other activities of life, we can not control how people treat us. We can however decide how we respond. On Lagos roads for example, We can decide if we’d chase them down and cuss them out or if we’d simply smile and go our way. We can decide if we’d pay attention to their curt remarks or if we’d ignore them and remain at a higher place. The latter one which avoids us stress and discomfort.

I understand that there are many hurtful things that other road users would do that can make you want to lash out. But with time keeping your cool gets easier and soon you’d be unfazed by their actions. 

Living a positive life is something which can be very challenging yet rewarding. One way I’ve been able to live one, is by making sure that all that comes out from my mouth are positive. No shaming, abusing, or bringing down with my mouth. After all, as the good Lord taught, it is that which comes out from a person, that defiles him/her. 

Enough with the taking from my end, what do you think? 

Image source.


It has come to my notice that we girls tend to dress indecently. 

Honestly, I have been culprit of indecent dressing once or twice, or maybe a couple of 100 times. lol. Seriously though, I want to know when the dressing can undoubtedly be termed “indecent”

We girls tend to dress according to trend. These days though, the trend is to show more skin, and wear bold attires that tend to captivate the attention of people when we step in a room, or walk on the road, you know what I mean. 

But I want to know, is it really worth it? As much as we like to be the centre of attention and attraction, what kind of attention are we attracting. 

Most times when my friends tell me some guy on the road harassed them or someone was following them with his car I first of all ask “What were you wearing? ” because it’s a known fact that men are attracted/turned on by what they see. 

So sister if you’ve ever been follwed by a car chances are the brother was attracted to you very sexy looking stomach in that crop top, or your thighs in the skirt or maybe the figure hugging dress you wore “just to go get something” ,or “just to go see him or her ”

In my opinion, it is very okay to be attractive and show off what you’ve got, but you should really take into consideration the type of attention you’d be attracting and maybe it will shape your choice of clothes . Unless you enjoy the attention, the lustful looks , and perversive comments . But be sure to know that rape is real

Also, the type of pictures we take and put up in social media can attract perverse attention. I for one hate nasty comments on my pictures. So I try to keep them decent even though some times I can’t help myself. I’d talk more on this in my next article. 

Let me know if you love it or not so, I’d know for sure if this is my calling or not . Do have a Blessed day💜💜

Oshime Gbafe.

Feature image source.